Dear Men, Put the Podcast Down
I'm presenting tonight's opinion with little or no evidence and no citations, because apparently no one has been keeping track of any. For example, on April 5th thousands (or maybe millions) of people marched in every major city and small town in America, fighting back against the Trump Administration, and declaring "Hands Off" our bodies, our laws, our rights, our friends, our status, you-name-it. Signups said it was 600,000, but eyeballs, hearts, and TikTok accounts said 3 to 5 million, with hundreds of thousands of marchers in single cities alone.
I was one of those little ants down there shouting the people united will never be divided and appropriating Civil Rights-era protest anthems. I wrapped a "bans off our bodies" hankie around my midsection like a symbolically protective loincloth and marched down 5th Avenue in New York City all the way to Madison Square Park where things fizzled out.
Now, there are no stats, and there is apparently no evidence in the whole of the World Wide Web, but with my eyeballs, heart, and TikTok account I noticed something, something proven again and again after flipping through my phone, searching Google images, and sharing stories with friends from other cities: where were all the men?
I know, I know, you're going to tell me that you brought a guy, or your husband came, or there was a significant male presence from your community. And they weren't invisible, and they did stand up, and they did sing, and they did march. They do exist. But we have to be honest with ourselves, the numbers aren't great. When you look at pictures of Washington D.C. and New York City, small towns like Appleton, Wisconsin and Sequim, Washington, the crowds are filled with women. There are men in attendance, but only speckled throughout a sea of raging estrogen.
Here's where I tell you I live in a house full of men. There are four of them, of varying sizes. I do my best to raise the boys well, teach them what I know, talk to them on their level about big and small issues, and guide them to be advocates for their neighbors before themselves. But if there's one thing I've learned in world of testosterone, it's that being an advocate for something has gotten a little muddled, if not altogether complacent.
Fellows, here's where I need you to hear me (shouting from my highest horse): informing yourselves is not the same as standing up on the right side of history. Listening to a podcast and having an opinion about something is not the same as making change. Watching the Daily Show and complaining about the in-laws' politics is not the same as waking up early on a cold day and marching in the rain for five hours.
Call your representatives with a list of demands.
Write something. To someone. Anyone.
Have conversations about politics outside your house.
Do something physical.
Get dirty.
Feel uncomfortable.
Because it's mostly women out here fighting back against a brand-new authoritarian government, around our jobs, around our families, and around the reputations that precede us with vocabulary like "emotional," "hysterical," "loud," "rebellious," "bitchy," and the worst one of all: "feminist."
Guys, we need you out there 50-50, doubling the numbers, but also standing in support of not just your female counterparts, but an entire country of people who are losing their rights one by one. Disappearing for their skin color. Disappearing soon for their opinions.
So put the podcast down, pick up the mantle of a waning democracy, and march.
See you all April 19th, 12 noon.
Ellie is an author, editor, and owner of Red Pencil Transcripts, and works with filmmakers, podcasts, and journalists all over the world. She lives with her family just outside of New York City, and is represented by Vicki Marsdon at High Spot Literary.
Im a male and was there and even got some odd looks from women because I was an anomaly. I’m ex army and white upper mc. Look like a republican on the south. I was there. And there were not many of us
Thank you!! YES, MAN UP BOYS!! We need you by our sides!!